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The Un-Nominated React: Updating Throughout the Day

Well. The nominations are out. So, it’s like… time for Tony Fever and stuff. We here at The Craptacular are getting into the spirit by asking today’s most burning question of some of theater’s finest.

That’s right. We’re asking what it’s like to NOT be nominated for a Tony Award today. Strap in and get ready for some real insider insight.

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Actor F Michael Haynie, Holler If Ya Hear Me

 

When I the heard the nominations were gonna be announced I started to get all nervous. This was the first time I have ever been eligible. You don’t wanna stress out too much and you don’t wanna not call your mom, even though you know it’s all she’ll ask you about. So you simply let the days tick by and wait. The “you deserve it”s and the “I mean, OBVIOUSLY you’re gonna get the Nom’s make you smile like the Grinch, but you MUST keep perspective.

Then it happens: the announcement is made. It’s the closest thing to the old “did I make the spring musical” list-checking feeling you’ve felt since your high school days. But after you’ve read the list ten times in a row, you have to come to terms with it… You didn’t get nominated. The well-wishes and hyperboles turn into a sour-tasting pit in your stomach. It’s not about who got it, cause it’s a great list, but… ugh. You just sit there watching your phone and Facebook feed fill with “shocked” and “appalled” and “how DARE they”.

But the hardest part is the phone call to you mom. And the hardest sentence you’ve ever uttered takes “places” in your throat: “Mom, I didn’t get nominated for the Broadway.com Audience Choice Award for Best Broadway Replacement.”

Then you head to rehearsal for Holler If Ya Hear Me only to feel as if you’re being pelted by the non-stop group praise being heaped on Ben Thompson (nominated for his portrayal as Trunchbull over the last couple months). All the “OH MY GOD, YOUR TRUNCHBULL WAS SO GREAT” followed by his “it’s an honor to be nominated”! Over and over and over.

So now I’ll be stuck sitting in the Palace Theatre every day covering his role in Holler and covering my face as the Broadway.com Audience Award committee sees the show and beats me up for my lunch money after. And all I can do is hope to keep my chin up in the midst of this heartbreaking and career-altering snub from this prestigious institution. I guess my Boq wasn’t good enough. Next time Broadway.com Audience Choice Awards, next time.

…Wait, you said Tonys? Oh, who cares: Gentleman’s Guide To Love & Murder for the sweep. BAM! *mic drop*

 

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Actor Andrew Kober, Les Miserables

I was at home with my wife and dog. We had just finished putting up all the streamers and balloons, and the big “Congratulations, Andrew, on your Tony Nomination” sign. I had about 40 close friends here to celebrate what we were all sure would be a big morning for me. We hired a New Orleans-style brass band. Six-foot inflatable Tony statues. We really went for it.

Of course, I’ve heard it from friends, colleagues, folks at the stage door, that I was basically a lock for a nomination for my work as “Innkeeper/Babet” in Les Miz. But I tried to keep it all in perspective, and I didn’t want to seem like I was taking it for granted.

Having read a lot of “reaction pieces” over the years, I did what I understand most new Tony nominees do: I got in bed and waited for a call from my agent (I had the rest of the party wait in the living room for my tearfully surprised emergence).

8:40 came and went.

8:50 came and went.

9:00 came and went.

I called my agents office just to make sure it wasn’t on fire or something, but no such luck. The trombonist came in to inform me that I had been, once again, snubbed.

I’ll be honest. It hurts. More financially than in any other way, since I shelled out all this cash for my nomination morning party, and I’ve already purchased several tuxedos for the Tonys themselves, as well as the myriad events leading up to them.

I’m delighted for the actors that were nominated in my category, Danny, Nick, Josh, James, and Jarrod (names which, without last names or context, read like the members of a One Direction cover band as opposed to the incredible actors I know them to be). This, too, shall pass. I will spend today like all of my snubbed brethren, tweeting to my friends that were nominated about how proud I am of them. And tonight, when I take the stage at the Imperial Theater, I will do so with the knowledge that I have done my best, and will continue to until the Tony Nominating Committee sees fit to honor me, at which point I will immediately give my two-weeks notice and move to Hollywood.

(In all seriousness, I’m stupid-nerdy-lame excited about our 3 nominations for Les Miz, especially the one for Ramin, who is only a jerk some of the time).

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Composer Drew Gasparini

So I wasn’t nominated… Okay that’s fine. I’m not mad…………………….. I’M PISSED!!!! We GET it, Les Miz! Now make room for some of the other musicals out there!

Here are the reasons I should win a Tony this year despite the fact that nothing I’ve written has even made it to Broadway:

1) John Johnson has produced shows of mine. Everything the man touches gets nominated for a Tony. NOT ME!!!
2) Matthew Murphy has taken my press shots and production shots. Everything the man takes a picture of gets launched into the Tonysphere! NOT DREW!!!
3) Jason Robert Brown does all my orchestrations!!!! (This is a slight fabrication)
And
4) Hugh Jackman owes me one!!! When I went to see his last Wolverine movie, the movie projector broke and I was promised a refund. IT NEVER CAME!!! So at the very least, he can hand me a fuckin Tony!!!

Sorry. It’s just that I’ve been busting my hump for almost 10 years…. 9 years…. Okay… 8 years… FINE!!! 7 years!!! And I think it’s time that my genius was recognized!!!!

Tony??? Bologna!!!

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