Ummm… Recap.

Hey guys!

Lucky here. The Mick is indisposed at the moment, which means it’s my job to update the Hottielympics tonight. And I just want to take a moment to tell you something: Like most musical theater nerds, I know fuck all about sports. And things like this that sort of mimic sports, and sportsmanlike sportiness.

Like, I know so little about what’s happening in the Hottielympics — besides the voting for hot people part, which is pretty straightforward — that I’m more or less 90% sure I’m going to a) tell you some wrong things b) improperly use the word “brackets,” which to me are those things they glued to your teeth to hold on your braces when you were nine, and c) disgrace myself before people who actually know and care about sports.

So now that expectations are fully managed, I’m going to try to recap what’s going on in this little contest of ultimate Broadway hotness. The operative word here being try.

Here’s an overview of Hottielympics reality as I understand it:

• Jeremy Jordan v. Stark Sands, you guys. There were literally more than 2,500 votes on that match. You know what that means? It means that you bitches have a LOT of time on your hands, and that you care about the relative hotness of Jeremy Jordan and Stark Sands so much that you voted 2,500 times. Like, when I say things like, “Yeah, you guys. There were like, two thousand votes,” I’m usually joking. I’m usually just trying to say that there were a lot. But this was a literal plethora of votes. I would say it was too many to count, but it clearly wasn’t. So once you guys vote so many times that there are too many votes to count, then I’ll be super impressed. For now I’m just mildly surprised.
• The Will Chase fangirls came out in FORCE. How much force? They helped Will kick Gavin Creel’s ass. Who can even say that they kicked Gavin Creel’s ass besides those Billy Elliot children whose names I can’t be troubled to remember, or even Google? But I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. If you’re a Will Chase fangirl, you’re a fighter by nature.
• Laura Osnes won, because you guys all clearly want to be her. Or you just want to kiss Jeremy Jordan. Same difference.
• Audra McDonald is beating everyone, just like in real life.
• Aaron Tveit is winning. We’re sure this would make him really happy if he knew, and our goal is always to keep Aaron Tveit happy.
• Other stuff.

Yay! You get to vote some more tomorrow. I think…