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5 Reasons Why Spider-Man Needs to Open Right Now

Reeve Carney brings his pretty to the stage in Spider Man.

Look at you, beautiful.

To the shock and awe of exactly no one, Spider-Man: Turn off the Dark has delayed the start of previews by several weeks and pushed its opening from December 21st 2010 to January 11, 2011.

What might be shocking, however, is the enthusiasm we here at The Craptacular feel for this show.  We are dying  for Spider-Man to open, and we’re not even joking right now. Honestly.

Here’s why:

1. So people can stop being seriously injured. Because obviously actual performances are far less dangerous than rehearsals, right? Right…
2. Because we’re dying to either love it or hate it.  But mostly, we’re dying to love it.
3. So Reeve Carney can be famous. Because his pretty face shouldn’t be hidden in the recesses of the Foxwoods Theater forever. We should be able to ogle it. Regularly. Stat.
4. So we can see how big Julie Taymor’s balls really are. We’re guessing, just based on what we’ve heard, that gargantuan won’t even cover it.
5. So Bono can add Broadway Composer to that really empty resume of his. That guy is such a slouch. He needs this.

Photo: Peter Yang for Rolling Stone

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