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Weekend Agenda: This Is Kind of Boring Edition

Summer lovin’, had you a blast. Well, we hope so anyway. We hope you’re dividing your time evenly this weekend between working on your tan, drinking beverages that contain a little paper umbrella, peeling off your dead, sun-scorched skin, and talking about the following theater-related stuff…

  • Now that her contract with Tom Cruise Enterprises has expired, Katie Holmes needs some shit to do. Enter Theresa Rebeck who, after getting the boot from Smash, also needs some shit to do. Together, they’re hitting Broadway this fall with the new family drama Dead Accounts. Katie Holmes + Theresa Rebeck + Broadway? This cannot fail.
  • Well, now we know why Jesus vacated the Neil Simon Theater — besides Superstar’s dismal returns — God needed the theater for another show about religiousness. And by God, we mean Kathie Lee Gifford, whose new musical Scandalous, about Aimee Semple McPherson, the world’s first superstar evangelist, will open this fall starring Carolee Carmello.
  • As if Glengarry, Glen Ross wasn’t exciting enough with Bobby Cannavale and Al Pacino in the cast, we learned they’ll be joined by Richard Schiff—TOBY ZIEGLER, YO!—and Jeremy Shamos. We needed CPR to recover after reading the press release, so, we hope they have a portable defibrillator backstage at the Schoenfeld to revive us after the first preview. And every performance thereafter.
  • Sample Headline: Christian Bale Wishes Newsies, and Jeremy Jordan, Well! Translated Headline: Christian Bale Expresses his Profound, Thinly Veiled Indifference Regarding Newsies on Broadway and Does Not Know Jeremy Jordan’s Name.
  • Intriguing, In-Development New Musical of the Moment: Murder Ballad, a new rock musical starring Will Swenson about an uptown mom with a shady past. Bonus points: Justin Levine is musical directing.
  • The lovely Celeste Holm, Fairy Godmother for the Ages, passed away this week at 95.

{ 1 comment… add one }

  • Carolyn July 23, 2012, 3:34 pm

    Thank you, so much, for that Christian Bale link. I wonder if he even remembers the name of “the character [he] played.” Brilliant.

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