Okay. It’s really his character, big hick Benny Perkins’ fanny pack. But still. We couldn’t take our eyes off it from the minute it hit the Hardbody stage.
1. Condoms
2. Gu
3. Chew
4. Blow-up doll
5. A copy of The Art of War
6. Tupac on casette
7. Lavender hand lotion
8. Rhyming Dictionary
9. Miniature bottles of Cuervo
10. Pitch pipe
11. Suede cleaner
12. Diabetic socks
13. 50 Pesos
14. Zinc sunscreen
15. Dr. Scholl’s Massaging Gel Insoles
16. Opera glasses
17. The latest issue of Guns & Ammo
18. A 10-Gallon Hat
19. A pair of scissors once used by Dwight Yoakam
20. NRA member card
21. Big League Chew
22. Starbucks gift card with .14 on it
23. Nail file
24. Empty sample tube of Calvin Klein Obsession
25. Nicotine gum
26. Listerine breath strips
27. Four losing scratch tickets
28. Razr flip phone in purple
29. Toothpics
30. Several partially used, travel size Speed Sticks
31. No Doze
32. Business card for a brothel in Reno
33. Forty-five pennies, including one from 1983
34. Eight Canadian pennies
35. Full change of underwear
36. Phone charger that does not go with his phone
37. A Squeegee
38. 4 stray Jelly Bellies, Margarita flavor
39. Massage oil
40. Wallet-sized photo of George H.W. Bush
41. Plastic handcuffs
42. Air horn
43. 15 square feet of blue tarp with bungee cords
Photo: Jenny Anderson
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